A Threshold Path (Poem)

Hey, Readers!

Long time no see, eh? I've been meaning to update, and of course there are several things I could have written about, I just haven't made the time in my busy schedule lately. Tonight, I got online intending to spend an hour or so answering messages and emails, and then watching a few videos. Well, a few hours later, I was still answering messages, and now I have a list of topics to mention next time I do a video.

One thing I will mention is the impetus for this post, which is that I received an email notification of a comment left here on my blog. The comment was letting me know that I have been added to the Pagan Blog Directory! And there is a brand new blog button on the sidebar of my blog to prove it. =) (Shown to the right, here.)

The directory was evidently lost, so it's being redone, so if you know of any blogs that used to be on it, please submit them to the directory so they may be re-added. Likewise, if you know of any that you would like to see on the list that may not have been before (I do not believe I was on it before, or if I was, I wasn't notified then), let them know! There are separate directories for websites and things like Facebook Pages, but this specific one is for blogs. And do use it to find others to follow!

As for the title of this post, I was prodded by the manner in which my blog is listed in the directory. The Witchy Stuff is listed under the category "Wicca." This may seem obvious to those of you who know me as a Wiccan, but it is less so to me, being the one living my path. Now is a good time to put down some thoughts I've been having for a while now, some of which I've expressed in the past, some which have gone unspoken, and some altogether relatively new. And, well, apparently it's going to be in poem form. Enjoy.

~

My path began with a Wiccan tilt, with Cunningham and Ravenwolf,
with mama's Native influence and my own love of this green Earth.
I read and studied, practiced, erred, and kept it secret for a while
Until I felt more comfortable with calling "Wiccan" my own style.
But I was young and all the Wiccans on the internet weren't fond
of my quite broken lineage and lack of ini-ti-a-tion.
They said I wasn't one of them, that my beliefs were not enough,
that I had to be taught, somehow, and if I didn't do that, tough.
But I, resilient, knowledge-lead, had some informants of my own
who gave me confidence to tread, and so I came into my own.
"I am a Wiccan," I would say, "though eclectic and solit'ry"
and over years a Wiccan Witch is how I have come known to be.
Yet over time, from year to year, my knowledge and experience grow
and less often am I comfortable with names by which I used to go.
I still have Wiccan beliefs, yes, and I intend to keep that part
of my young path, wherever I go, because it spoke to my young heart.
But as of late, the general term of "Pagan" more appeals to me.
Yet when I use it, I am sometimes struck by what the others see.
In arguments sometimes, when I attempt to hold a wider view,
speaking from my Universal tendencies and attitudes,
"You're only speaking from a Wiccan point of view," I now am told,
"That's the Wiccan way of things." Thus the verdict they behold.
And yes, I cede, I do come from a Wiccan sort of origin,
But can I never branch back out from somewhere I was not let in?
The traditional Wiccans never claimed me (so I never claimed to be one of them),
and now the general Pagans shame me, too much Wiccan, then again.
Not enough for the one extreme, but too much one for this, the other.
And where exactly does that leave me? On my own path, same as ever.
An in between is where I walk, a balance on the railroad tracks.
Balance is my major goal, and here I walk, a threshold path.
It's neither in nor is without, nor is it perfect dark or light,
it isn't kin or kind to yours, and it contains both "wrong" and "right."
Is it "Wiccan"? Who could know? Some say yes, and others, no.
The thing I'm sure of is that there is always forward left to go.
From one exit, another entrance. Another threshold left to meet.
And lifetimes hence from what's "complete." And miles to go before I sleep.

Blessings~
-C-

Rights to Terms (Wiccan)

Hey, Readers,

Even as I typed the title for this post, I realized just how big a topic it really is. This goes into so many areas that I've come across in the past year, such as whether neopagans can use certain practices from some faiths, whether you have to be a certain gender or race or nationality to use some practice, and so on. Due to all the ways this could go, I'm going to stick to my original intention when I opened up this page to post a blog, which is to discuss a little more my choice to call myself a Wiccan.

I wrote a long post on my tumblr about this a while ago, where I describe the conversation I had with an initiated Gardnerian crone to whom I really look for guidance. When we first got acquainted, I actually didn't know that she was Gardnerian, just that she was Wiccan and believed and practiced very similar to myself, but with the added benefit of the wisdom of her years. It wasn't until I knew her for a couple years already that I heard her say she was an initiated Gardnerian, and I was like, "What?!" Because, in my experience, Gardnerians online are the ones who say you can't be a Wiccan if this, and you're not a real Wiccan if that. And actually, there are a lot of non-Wiccans, or non-initiates who say that, as well. But the books I read, and the experiences I've had with Deity, have told me that it isn't necessary to be initiated by another human being in order to follow Deity in a certain way.

I know myself. I know what my beliefs and practices are, and I know that they are not akin to traditional Wicca. Yet, there are beliefs that are Wiccan which I do hold. I was lucky enough to be able to speak to one Gardnerian initiate, and she asked me things like, "How do you do this? What do you do when you do this part of ritual? What goes through your mind? What does this thing mean to you?" And I was honest because after all these years of being told I'm wrong, dangit, I just wanted to know once and for all! And I was not told "Sorry, child, that's not Wiccan." Instead I heard surprise and pride, "That's exactly what we did in my covens, and it says a lot to me that you came upon this on your own." (These are all paraphrases, not the exact quotes.) And we discussed things that we think are characteristic of Wicca, whether it be traditional or eclectic, solitary or group. To me, a person who believes these Wiccan beliefs can call themselves a Wiccan. But people who do not have the same beliefs at all, probably should not. As I've said several times before in videos and maybe on here, I did message with a man online who told me that he is Wiccan but purposely does not follow the Wiccan Rede. Well, I personally feel that there is probably a better label out there for him than "Wiccan." I've also had a young kid message me talking about a very specific practice format he was using, involving a certain number of deities, the practitioner being a sacrifice, and so on, and claiming it was Wiccan. In fact, I assume he was asking me about this because I identify as Wiccan and he thought what he was doing was Wiccan. It didn't sound like any kind of Wicca I had ever heard of, even after doing some more research, so I asked what his sources were, and as it turns out, it wasn't a Wiccan source. He just wanted to use the label. I don't think people should use the label willy-nilly for no reason at all. But I think if your belief and practice falls within the realm, you should not be told that you cannot use a term for yourself.

Gerald Gardner may not agree with me. But I'm not Gardnerian. I don't claim to be.

(I've even had people say I can't be Wiccan if I don't follow Gardner because he started it. There are a good many examples of things evolving and moving past their initiators--pardon the word choice.)

I bring this up again because I was checking old comments on one of my videos, and I found a reply from a year ago that I never saw or replied to. It's old news now, so I won't reply to it and cause more issue, but I do think it's good to talk about. Someone told me that they are a traditionalist of the sense that they believe you must be initiated and things like that, in order to properly claim the title "Wiccan." I said that I agreed with their right to believe this, which is why I never claim to be a Traditional Wiccan. That would be incorrect as I have not been initiated into a tradition. But I don't believe you have to be initiated into your own belief, and I think Deity is actually the only one(s) that needs to accept us on a certain path. I told them that I do think some people use the term for no reason (such as the examples I gave above), but that through my research and speaking with initiates, I have determined that I may call myself Wiccan based on my actual belief and practice. Their reply which I did not see until now, says that while they respect the thought I have put into this, they still don't think I have a right to use the term, and since they strongly believe this and I strongly believe what I believe, we should agree to disagree. And as most people will when they know they're being rude but don't want to be, they ended the comment with a smiley face.

I do think it's everyone's right to choose what works best for them. If you personally believe that you shouldn't use a term until you are initiated into a group, that's fine. But I don't think it's okay to tell other people they cannot do something, based on your personal belief for yourself. Sounds a lot like non-pagans telling us what we need to do, doesn't it? Why the ingroup prejudice? I have a pretty good friend/acquaintance on YouTube who has made it clear to me multiple times that he personally will not ever call himself a Wiccan until he is initiated, AND that he will not accept any branch of Wicca other than Gardnerian--even those that developed directly from Gardnerian (Alexandrian, Algard, etc.)--because he personally believes Traditional Gardnerian Wicca is the only valid one. But never once has he claimed that I am not a real Wiccan or that I am doing it wrong. The fact that he personally needs a certain thing, doesn't make him think of me in a lesser way. I appreciate that so much.

And no, I don't think every traditional Wiccan is going to think I'm okay just because several of them have. Just because some initiates accept me and my right to use a term that describes my belief, does not mean they all will. That just means I would probably work better with those who care about my beliefs, and not whether a human male initiate initiated me. (No one usually mentions the fact that technically each person must be initiated by the opposite sex, but yet in many covens throughout the years there were not enough men, so women were initiated by women. So what's the important thing, being initiated? Or being initiated exactly the way Gardner said we should be?)

The fact of the matter is that practices evolve. People change things, the times change things, resources change things... Yes, some people use terms to describe something that has no tie at all to the original thing, in which case it seems like maybe you could choose a better term. But a lot of people fit Wicca who don't do it the way it was done in the 40s and 50s. Even initiates don't do things the exact same way as their predecessors. Each coven that breaks off can change the way it does things if it chooses to. Let's say hypothetically that each coven hiving off changes one thing about how they believe or practice. Then covens hiving off from there each change one more thing, so on and so on. If the branching off eventually gets so far away from the original beliefs and practices that none of it looks like Wicca anymore, are they still Wiccan based on lineage of initiation? Or are the beliefs and practices really what matters, regardless?

When you get right down to it, I honestly don't care what label I use. I have a preferred one, but it's still just words used to help describe my views. I don't care what label best helps people describe me in their own mind. However, I do care when people think they know what someone else is. So yes, we should agree to disagree. I may be bothered by the fact that deep down, you don't think I have a right to my own belief's terminology because I don't have the same resources you do. Just like it still seemed weird when a Christian friend told me, "Yeah, I respect your beliefs. I think you're going to Hell, but I respect your beliefs." "I don't think you deserve the same term I do, but I respect your beliefs." But no, we're not hurting each other by disagreeing. My path doesn't affect yours, and your path doesn't affect mine.

And yeah, okay, I frequently deal with people of completely other faiths by saying something like "I respect that belief, but I don't personally believe it." Somehow I think this is different than "I respect that you have that belief but don't think you have the right to it," or "I respect that belief but I still think you're wrong." I don't necessarily think people are wrong just because it doesn't work for me. (Some beliefs I do think are "wrong," morally, but that's another story.)

And I have known people in my personal life whose choice to use certain terms offended me, because since I know them in real life I know the supreme lack of actual knowledge or experience they put into it. So to me it's an insult to use a term having put no work into it, which I have worked for years to feel able to use. So I do understand that some traditionalists may find my use of the term the same exact kind of insult. They got initiated and I didn't so I don't deserve it. I do sympathize there, since these people do not know me personally and cannot know exactly the work I've put in. The lack of access to a coven is one thing. To me, the effort, belief, practice, knowledge, and experience are another.

One day, I will approach a level of wisdom such that it will not even bother me that people really don't respect me. One day, I will not mind at all what people say, and I will not feel any need to defend myself, educate others about their misinformation and hatred, or even to give it a thought. Perhaps one day I will drop my activist standpoint and just let people judge and hate and dictate, because it really doesn't affect me. That day, it will not matter to me that people are incorrect when they think they know it all.

But, oh, readers and friends... Today is not that day. It is an ongoing process. I can feel much improvement from my stance a decade ago, and even a few years ago. But I still have far to go.

Blessings~
-C-

Colorful Magick

Hey, Readers,

I'm actually about to head out the door and become busy for the next few hours, and probably just retire to shower and bed upon my return home. But I wanted to post a quick, quick little thing. It's something I've said probably dozens of times now, between my videos, Pagan Perspective videos, messages to people, conversations, and Tweets.

"White" and "black" magick. *shudder*

Those terms, used seriously, make my eyes roll instantly. This is one of the things that continues to bother me under the surface. While I know it doesn't truly make any difference in the long run, it irks me, still.

Magick is magick.

When we do magick (or magic, however you choose to spell it is fine), we often use color. Or colour. =) I love using color symbolism in my workings, and often, the energy I'm working with will take on a color. So yes, magick involves color. But I simply do not buy that there is such a thing as "white magick" and a thing such as "black magick." Magick is itself, colorless and all colors, beyond categorization like that of a box of crayons. It is a tool, and as such can be used any way the practitioner desires. Magick has the capability of doing good, and of being used for less than good.

I understand that this is what most people mean when they say "white" and "black" magick, but I think some people are still using the terms as though they mean separate things. People will say things like "I practice white magick, I would never do black magick." But that doesn't have anything to do with the magick. The magick you're using can do both. It's YOU that makes the decision. YOU that has the flavor for good or otherwise. I will not say "bad" or "evil" because I don't think that's proper, either. Not in this case. Not all which is not light is bad.

Anyway, I think we could all get a lot more out of life and our practice by doing away with such "black and white" imagery as putting magick, something profound and encompassing of many possibilities, into a box of crayons. The colors in this case are symbols, no more. Visual aids.

Magick is the box the colors are in, and the hammer and nails or clay or stone used to create it, and the carpenter or sculptor or some such creator. Magick is so much more.

Blessings~
-C-

P.S. There is a video on my channel about this, which I'll link later on. Or search it for yourself, YouTube username cutewitch772, video name "What is Magick?" I think. Cheers.

So You're New to the Craft...

Hey, Readers,

This is my script to this week's video on The Pagan Perspective. It covers three questions: one for general advice for new pagans, and two from a new pagan about how to be a pagan and about the number of gods.

The questions:

from CulainRuledByVenus
--I just uploaded a video directed at people new to Paganism, and now am wondering how you too would address them. Considering the broad spectrum of all that it is, implies, entails, and even all that it is made out to be by those who misunderstand and misrepresent it, I'm asking for your thoughts on this in the spirit of general advice and suggestions. I had suggested that newcomers should gather many perspectives about it, and thought "What better accommodation than the Pagan Perspective?"
Thank for reading,
Culain
http://www.youtube.com/watch?v=0sKs9Ra6t1c 

from mikilee2290
--i need help being a pure pagan. i been raised in a christian family, and im only 12, and i wanna be pagan, but was never taught how. can you help me?
--how many gods are there

Briefly Bristled

Hey, Readers!

I feel like I've written a lot on here about things revolving around church. It makes sense, since the new UU community is the latest brand new development in my religious and spiritual life. However, I wanted to post about something unrelated to church, even briefly.

PEOPLE STILL GENERALIZE...
The only thing I have to say right now is that today, on YouTube, someone left a comment asking if I was a redditor, or a person who uses reddit.com, which I am not. I'm not actually very familiar with it, though I've seen it, so I decided to check it out. I searched "pagan" to see what kinds of interesting things there might be that I'm missing out on. The first thing I saw was an atheist man who's married to a pagan woman, asking if such a pairing was bound to lead down a negative road. This caught my eye because I'm currently dating an atheist. The second thing to I saw on the page--and the last, for after this, I did not want to look further--was a post titled something like "Let's forget Christians, Jews, and Muslims for a second. Let's talk about how ANNOYING Wiccans and other 'neo-pagans' are!"

I shouldn't have clicked on it. You know I shouldn't have. I know I shouldn't have. But I did.

The post was from someone who previously identified as Wiccan, but now only had very negative things to say. But, as is so terribly common, they were actually only referring to people who use the title but have no practice or knowledge of what they speak of. They were not at all describing an actual practitioner. I honestly can't remember any exact words now, because I looked at it over an hour ago and I will not look again. As soon as I saw the usual misinformation and generalizations leveled at us, I stopped reading closely, so my memory has thankfully allowed the information to slip away. I just recall the usual stuff, like the author claiming that all Wiccans are the way they described (when they're clearly not), that none of them know anything, that they will take information and practices from any culture that people know little about and call it their own but don't know any history, etc. Now, I'm an eclectic Wiccan, yes. My practice includes elements from other religions. That does not mean I don't know where they came from, what they mean, or why I use them.

Anyway, the post ended with a statement of annoyance--If you thought Christians and Jews and Muslims were bad/hard to reason with, try talking to a Wiccan! Sheesh! (Again, that's not verbatim, but that's what it said.) I also remember one reply/comment on the post, which was from someone who said they used to be pagan and then realized they were "a fucking idiot" and stopped believing it.

FRUSTRATION
It just frustrates me so much, still, that so many people will post outright hatred like that instead of admitting that not every Wiccan or neopagan out there is like that. Trust me, I know those people DO exist, and they will either learn or turn away from the path when they realize it's not for them. I'm not saying the unfortunate stereotype has no basis in reality. But such individuals are not experienced practitioners, or not serious about the path. They couldn't be, or they wouldn't be so uninformed. I have not yet met a truly dedicated practitioner who is anything like that horrible imagined view of us. Even beginners asking me if Wicca would be right for them are dedicated seekers, and they do not insist on calling themselves Wiccan if they don't think they are. I've only come across a few people who seem to insist on being called Wiccan even though from our conversations it's been clear to me that they are not, that their beliefs simply lean elsewhere.

I'm not a traditional Wiccan, but I'm not an idiot, randomly claiming the title with no reasoning behind it. I know many Wiccans like me, who may not be traditional, but have genuine work behind us and genuine dedication to our paths. So yes, it still bothers me that some people not only are bothered by those who do not yet know things, but also go on to claim that ANY WICCAN is this way! I can only teach by example, but people who are willing to spread such lies and generalized hate do not seek out sincere practitioners in order to change their minds. They don't want to be shown how wrong they are.

SHOULD HAVE BEEN A GAME-CHANGER
This reminds me of a comment I once got. The person commented that they could see, from my videos, that I am clearly a very intelligent girl who knows what she's talking about and has a true connection to her path. They said that they agree with my well thought out perspective on my path. So far, so good. They went on to say that because of this truth they could see in me, and because they themselves agree so much with my views, I must be a pagan, and "NOT a fluffy bunny Wiccan." Their words. Verbatim. You bet I remembered that one. Their argument was that since I am knowledgeable and they agree with me, I cannot possibly be Wiccan because Wiccans, as they believe, are ALL ignorant, uninformed children who don't have any idea what they're doing.

Instead of rerouting their stereotypes and saying Wow, here is a Wiccan who is clearly NOT what I thought Wiccans were... I must have been wrong, at least some Wiccans must be genuine! this person refused to admit that their ideas could have been incorrect, and INSTEAD said I must just be using the wrong name for myself. Clearly. That is the only possible explanation.

~
Anyway, this is nothing you wouldn't have heard from me before if you watch my channel, but it still gets my goat. I am perturbed. I have a hard time understanding how some people who accuse us of being so uninformed can remain so terribly uninformed, themselves.

Blessings~
-C-

Video on Labels

This is the text script from my PaganPerspective video this week. The video has an introduction as well as some more lines tossed in, so it's more than what you read here, if you want to watch it instead.

THE QUESTION:
from MephistophelesMyLord
--There's recent movement aiming to clear up labeling misconceptions for a lot of Pagans who practice religious witchcraft. British Traditionalists obviously are not keen on solitaries calling themselves Wiccan, and some solitaries don't feel neo-Wicca identifies their practice or that title feels wrong in some way. More information on this can be found here: http://rootsofritual.wordpress.com/category/through-the-leaves/

(Not really a question, but a topic to discuss. I guess, think of the question as ‘how do we feel about labels, what is correct and what isn’t, who or what should determine what labels people use, etc.?’)
------------------------

THE VIDEO RESPONSE:
Labels are useful for letting people know a starting point of something about us. The exact individual differs from every other individual, even in the group, so we always have to ask about specifics, but labels help us begin to understand a basic idea. Beyond that, I don't think labels should cause problems. The individual should be asked what they like to be called, and why. It's up to each person to decide, not anyone else to tell them.

Now I will address the elephant in the circle. Hi, Frank.
Now I will address the thing you're all itching to hear about.
I call myself a solitary eclectic Wiccan witch. And I'm not initiated into a traditional coven. The blog post given argues that if I were truly dedicated, I would seek out a coven even if it meant moving. * You know what? Someday I want to, but as a recent post-grad with very little money, I'm not about to do that. I personally see no issue with me calling myself what I do, because I think there is a difference between a traditional Wiccan and a solitary eclectic. I am always quick to point out that I am not a traditional member and therefore do not speak with that experience behind me. But I have spoken to initiates about what I DO practice, and at least those I've spoken to haven't seen a problem with my chosen label based on my beliefs. Others WILL disagree with me, I have no doubts about that. But since I never claim to be part of that group, I don't stress so much about it. As long as we all know what we mean and can explain it to someone who asks, someone who may have another definition of our label, I think we can say whatever we personally choose. Now, if I chose that title willy-nilly because it sounded cool, yeah, I would be ticked off at me, too. ** The article seems to suggest that what I practice is not Wicca but neo-Wicca or some other name altogether. If it makes YOU feel better to call me a neo-Wiccan, go ahead.

The weird thing is, a lot of the people urging me to stop calling myself a Wiccan are other non-initiates who believe similarly to me, but who agree that only traditional initiates can use the label. The difference is that I don't let that stop me from calling myself whatever I want and just explaining it. Like I said, YOU can call me whatever you need to call me in order to feel comfortable. I also just say I'm "Pagan" a lot of the time because it's quicker to say!

If a label seems wrong to you, don't use it, even if someone else may use it to define you, or even if it means essentially the same thing. Say what you like. If a label speaks to you, and you feel a strong reasoning for using it, you should be able to do so. Likewise, if no label seems right, you shouldn't feel pressured to have to use one at all. A lot of people these days are going more towards the non-label idea and just talk about who they are, what they like, and so on instead of saying "I am a _____" fill in the blank.

I think it's helpful if we all have a basic definition for things, because like I said, knowing someone's preferred label is a starting off point for knowing something about them. But I think we all need to remember that not everyone uses labels in the same way, so we should always take them as JUST a basic starting point idea, and beyond that we have to ask the person about their individual characteristics. Or, you don't have to, but if you want to really know about them then you should ask. Because labels are for soup cans.

I believe two rather contradictory statements to each hold truth: 1) It's just a word, yet 2) Words hold power. That's why we go back and forth about things like this. On one hand, it doesn't really matter in the long run what word we use. On the other hand, it does mean something to us. That's why I think our first responsibility is to ourselves and what we feel comfortable with, if anything.

That's all I have for you this week on paganperspective, so thank you very much for watching and I will see you next time! Blessed Be & Goodbye!

Blessings~
-C-

P.S. Yeah, I did write this out before seeing that the title of Rich's video is "Labels are for soup cans." Hah!

* In the video I added on the idea that even if you move to find a coven, it may not be the right coven for you. So should we keep moving around until we find the right one? At this point in my life that's not possible, but someday I would like to experience group practice more so than I have in small groups already.

** Here, in the video, I put some text over the video mentioning that I once came across someone online who said that they call themselves a Wiccan but do not share any Wiccan beliefs and especially that they work against the Rede. Stuff like that is odd to me.